Choose to love

A friend once pinged me a message. Do you decide to love, she asked.

The wheels in my head started to turn. Mind you, it's really hard to get into the mindset of philosophizing about love when it's had you nauseous from ups and downs and sideway turns for no less than four years.

I said it was a decision. Someone always chose to love. It was a conscious decision. BUt my friend disagreed. She said that the first moment you realized you were falling love was NOT a decision. It just happened. I did not agree.

My point was, even the thought 'hey, i think i'm falling in love' is an admission of some sort. WHen you entertain the possibility, you choose to think it. It does not force itself upon you. It's a decision in your mind to accept that new framework for seeing a possible chance at love.

Many romantics will disagree, I know. Stuff like 'it just hit me' and 'The first time I saw him, I knew' or 'I just knew the moment he smiled at me when we had that wonderful cup of coffee after that nice dinner'.

Get a grip, I say.

Love is a decision. A decision to think about love and think about the person you love in that context. Without that decision, you would never be able to identify that you had loved. It would just be a natural feeling of being really nice to a person (might even the reach the point of looking incestuous), in a silly twilight-zone kind of way, if you never chose to recognize love when it shows up on your front door.

Kinda like seeing an old drunk on the street but not recognizing that he is a lonely, confused, needy human being just like you.

Do you get me or do I still have to spell it out for you?

Argh, never mind. Time's a-wasting. Get on with your life and stop reading this.

Moral lesson is --- choose, choose, choose. Never play it safe or you'll never get anywhere spectacular.

And so in the words of my close friend Melv, 'Chow!' nyahahaha.